Studs Up

September 30, 2009, 10:44 pm
Filed under: Football, Liverpool FC


It’s at times like 2030 BST last night when I have no inclination to write about football, especially Liverpool FC. But it has to be done, so I’ve duly posted my view up on Liverpool Banter. You can read it here:


Out And About
September 26, 2009, 10:57 pm
Filed under: Football


Following Liverpool’s devastating annihilation of the immensely irritating Phil Brown’s Hull side at Anfield today, I’ve written a few thoughts on the game over at Liverpool Banter. You can read them by clicking this link:

Not So Much A Hiatus As A Yawning Chasm.
September 25, 2009, 11:55 pm
Filed under: Football


Fredorrarci over at the excellent Sport Is a TV Show apologised yesterday and described his blog as “tumbleweed-friendly”. He’d been absent for 7 days. So going by that, in recent times Studs Up has definitely been an area in which evapotranspiration outweighs precipitation (look it up). I could list my excuses, but they’re not terribly interesting. So instead, here are some links to kick things off again.

Elliot Tucker‘s contributions to The Run Of Play have often been documented here on Studs Up in light of their bizarre blend of the surreal and the amusing that is almost unique in terms of football writing. Samuel L Jackson once starred in a film that loosely referred to events inside Anfield, but Tucker’s Premiership Fiction seems much closer to the sort of thing we’d get if Quentin Tarantino directed a Premier League season:

But guess what, there’s more. Tucker has his own blog called Futfanatico, and it’s even weirder. Having read his imaginary interview with Brazilian Interfaith novelist Paulo Coelho on the current fortunes of Liverpool FC, I think he may have taken football-related writing to new levels of peculiarity. But why Elliot, why?

Overheard Telephone Conversation
September 4, 2009, 3:44 pm
Filed under: Liverpool FC


Tom: Howdy partner?

George: Tom – good to speak to you. What’s up?

Tom: Tryin to figure out some new ways to milk our cow, ya know?

George: Sure! Gotta keep up the payments and still leave some room for skimming off the top, there’s a recession on.
Good that the Spaniard didn’t walk when we cut his transfer budget to zero – he figures he’ll beat us by winning the title anyway, can you believe? But we still need another 20m for the interest due till the next refinancing of the loan. You got any ideas?

Tom: I have a humdinger of an idea, it’s so cool: we bring in a membership scheme, and make 5000 seats available for each home game to sell online to the ‘official members’.

George: You mean ‘official mugs’, right?

Tom: Right. The loyal patsies will sign up in numbers far in excess of the available tickets, – so that’s just money in our pockets for nothing – and even those who do occasionally get tickets will be paying the regular rate PLUS their membership subscription for them: close to a 100% price hike if they are successful just once! And we’ll make sure the system is so bad they won’t succeed often. Whaddya think?

George: Gotta admit, I am impressed Tom. But won’t they get mad and want their money back when they all try to get online to buy their tickets and the system buckles every time? I mean: I assume we are not going to upgrade the server to cope with the traffic? That would cost us money.

Tom: Are you kiddin? We ain’t gonna spend a damn thing! Believe me, they’ll still be comin’ back all season long, bright and early, every time a sale is on, refreshing and refreshing, reloading and reloading, redialling and redialling.

George: Yeah, ain’t that strange? I mean, ain’t it curious how they go on paying, and putting up with us? Go figure.

Tom: Don’t knock it, George. It’s making us richer.

George: Amen to that partner.

Spreading The Wings….
September 2, 2009, 5:23 pm
Filed under: Football


Much has been said about Arsenal striker Eduardo da Silva’s dive against Celtic during last Wednesday’s 2nd leg of the Champions League pre-qualifier, including an article I’ve written on the subject for my friends over at EPL Talk.

Check it out: